When first deciding to enter, “full-time-stay-at-home-mom-status,” in preparation for my little girl to arrive, I had thought it sounded like a perfect recipe for some increased R&R. I couldn’t have been farther from the truth. In fact, my normal morning routine of 1- 2 hours backstage in hair and make up is now a mad dash of breakfast making, choo-choo train finding, race car driving, lego stepping (and by the way, have you ever stepped on a lego? It will bring any grown man down to his knees in sheer agony!), book reading, soccer playing, laundry folding, tantrum throwing, floor mopping, vacuum cleaning, diaper changing awesome-ness! But, I’m not going to lie, its exhausting. By the time 8:00am rolls around I am checking the clock like, “Is it NAP time yet?” Not for Littleman, but for me!
This morning was no different, but as we were in the midst of the chaos, I noticed the littleman had gotten some crayons and paper from his craft drawer and had crawled up to the table to color. So taking advantage of every opportunity possible, I prepared myself a cup of Decaf coffee, grabbed my devotional and headed to the balcony for some time with the Lord. Keeping an eye on my son through our screen and sliding glass doors. I watched as he continued to color for about 15 minutes, all the while slowly loosing his crayons as they would roll from the table on to the floor, in the midst of his wild flipping of pages in his, “Airplane “Bird-Bird” Coloring Book.”
As the final crayon rolled to the floor, I watched as he tilted his head sideways and yelled, “Momma! Momma!” Responding, “One Minute Bunny,” laying down my book and setting my coffee aside, I went to stand up (which is no easy task at this point in pregnancy) and walk through the screen door, when I paused, watching him tilt his little head yet again and go, “Momma, Momma…Help. Please.” (Okay call me mean, but I stood there for a minute looking in to see what he was going to do next. He wasn’t in his high chair. I knew exactly what he wanted. And truthfully, he could easily get down and gather his crayons himself to continue coloring.)
He waited a moment, still not seeing me through the sliding glass doors, hopped down, and frantically began running from room to room, calling, “Momma, Momma! Mommmmmma!” (Okay don’t worry, I live in a city condo, so the time it took him to run through our entire house is like 3.7 seconds). When I walked in through the screen door, he was making his final turn around our hallway and burst into tears, grabbing my leg, and letting out a final, “Momma! Color. Floor.” (for those non-parents out there, that means, “Momma, my crayons are on the floor and now, how can I color?”
He wasn’t aware that I was watching the entire event unfold.
See, he wasn’t aware that I was here the entire time, listening to and watching his every move. I wasn’t ignoring him, nor hiding from him, nor failing to help him.
The first time he cried out for me, I responded. But he wasn’t listening for me.
The second time he cried out for me, I was standing there watching him, waiting, listening through the screen door, but he never lifted his head in my direction to see me.
As he went racing through the house in search of me, he wasn’t aware that I was never gone, that all he needed to do was look right next to where he had been.
And as he reached out and grabbed my leg, telling me the “tragedy” that had just unfolded, he wasn’t aware that I had seen, every crayon fall to the floor.
How many times in life are we like my LittleMan was today.
We cry out for help, but we don’t listen for OR to God’s response.
We cry out for help, but we don’t raise our eyes NOR our heads to seek Him.
Feeling lonely, scared, forgotten and abandoned, we frantically run around, in search of God and His hands in our life, only to hear, “My Child. What are you searching for? I am here. The Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 3:16
This week I encourage you to not only spend time studying Gods word on a daily basis but actively listen and seek Him in your daily life. God isn’t some far-out, scary higher being that we go to when there are “issues” to deal with. He is a friend. He wants to have a relationship with you. He wants to be someone that you spend time with on a daily basis, in good times and bad, so that when there are “issues,” you have unfailing confidence that He is by your side through every step of the way.
Joshua 1:9 : “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Deuteronomy 31:6 : “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your … Continue reading